A Modest Gay Proposal

Every time I fly into National Airport, er, I mean, Ronald Reagan National Airport, I cringe a little and think about The Ronald Reagan Legacy Project. They are the group who have made it their mission to "honor the historic achievements of President Ronald Reagan" by "naming at least one notable public landmark in all 3,067 counties after the 40th president." 

Not surprisingly, these pesky Reagan fanatics have made quite a bit of progress. You wouldn't believe how many things they have succeeded in having named after the old Gipper.  You can read the list of accomplished renamings here, but get a load of what's on their radar screen for the future:

-- The Pentagon
-- The U.S. 10 dollar bill
-- Ronald Reagan Day (February 6, Reagan's birthday)
-- Ronald Reagan Memorial Highway (New Jersey Route 15)
-- 16th Street in Washington, D.C.

They think big. They inspire me, in fact, and cause me to remember the group of enthusiastic 'Brokeback Mountain' fans who are right now working to get a Vermont mountain renamed after their beloved gay cowboy flick.

Let's go for it! I say we merge the Vermont idea with Reaganesque fanaticism and start a movement today to honor the historic acheivement of 'Brokeback Mountain' by putting its gay name on an important landmark in every state in this great country of ours.

'Brokeback Mountain' is arguably one of the most visible gay cultural phenomena to date. The movie put gays on the map, or at least on a way bigger map than ever before, and so wouldn't it follow that we should leverage that and literally get ourselves on the map?

I propose that this be added to The Gay Agenda, tout de suite. Let's get the Gay Mafia working on it. HRC and The National Gay and Lesbian Task Force should integrate this into their fieldwork and mobilize the grassroots forces to get a "Brokeback Mountain" something in every state! We can do this, people. Start thinking of what landmarks you want.

For starters, may I suggest the following:

Brokeback Mountain National Park (formerly Yellowstone National Park)


These should be among the easier things to tackle, since Republicans don't care about national parks anyway (oil-rich Alaskan wilderness areas notwithstanding).


Brokeback Bucks (Formerly the Dollar Bill)


What's more American than two manly cowboys on our country's most popular denomination? I think it's very fitting, but if booting George Washington off disturbs you (as displacing Hamilton off of the 10 for Ronald Reagan might too), let's make that $3 bill a reality. Small children and immigrants might not know that the $3 bill is the queer one, so we'll put Jack and Ennis right on the front. It's getting harder to actually buy anything with $1 bills anyway -- especially gas, food, medical care and housing.


Brokeback Mountain Parkway (formerly California Highway 1)


Frankly, Reagan can HAVE all the gross grey highways in America, and we'll even throw in the exit ramps. But US Highway 1, the Pacific Coast Highway: that's queer country.


Join me in this quest for gay visibility through the renaming of notable public landmarks. Photoshop your own vision of a Brokeback Mountain future and either post it on your blog and e-mail me a link, or e-mail me your Brokeback image and I will post it here if it's good. 

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My Big Gay Prediction: 'Idol' Will Go Man-on-Man, & Elliot Will Win

The final results of 'American Idol' this week turned up few surprises. Ditzy Kellie got a much-needed booting. Andrea Boccelli proved that she's audibly blonde, and honey, that's trouble. Kellie didn't just butcher 'Unchained Melody,' she marinated it and threw it on the grill. I wish her well and hope she finds someone to "play pottery" with back home.
 
Paris and Taylor are both gifted, but they will be voted off over the next two weeks, in that order, followed by Katharine. Last week I thought Katharine was a front-runner to win 'Idol.' I've changed my mind. Her gorgeous voice, great hair and distracting cleavage cannot help her, only because there are two other contestants who are better than she is.
 
It's pretty clear that Chris is going to make it to the final two. His fan base is HUGE and although I don't care for his genre of music, he is very talented and charming in a sort of rough, straight guy way -- the way that stimulates every gay man and straight woman's salivary glands.
 
Which leaves Elliot as the other finalist. That's right, America! I predict that the final two contestants will be Elliot and Chris, who will face off in a heart-pounding man-on-man musical duel.
 
Have you noticed how much better looking Elliot has gotten? Somebody is queer-eye'n him but good. This week he even zhooshed his hair, raising his cute factor several notches.  He totally nailed 'A Song for You' with that unassuming, velvety voice. He could win. He's solid. He's an underdog. He made Paula cry.
 
Actually, the Paula thing means nothing. She's so sensitive at the moment, I think she must feel air molecules colliding with her skin. Someone needs to adjust her medication or replace her with an animatronic robot like the ones at Disneyland before she implodes on live TV.
 
Which brings me to the Top Three Gayest Moments of 'American Idol' this week:
 
1) The Right Mascara Is Key: If a young, hot guy can move you to public displays of bawling insanity, you need to know good makeup, and Paula does. Otherwise, she'd not only be crazy, but she would look like Tammy Faye Bakker used to when her tears turned into twin gushers of Texas tea.

2) Ryan's Sharp Claws: I don't know if you caught it, but Ryan thought he was a judge for a minute and verbally bitch-slapped Katharine after her number: "For those who don't have the volume turned on, you're going to get plenty of votes." Meow. Katharine was not amused.
 
3) Ryan and Elliot's Matching Outfits: Standing side by side in dark suits with matching baby blue silk ties (Ryan went skinny while Elliot chose wide), they so looked like they were on their way to their own commitment ceremony. Cute couple!

So ... You're with me that it's going to be Chris and Elliot in the final two, right? Right.

Related Links
Yamin?! Yeah, Man!(The Malcontent and Robbie)
'Idol' Talk | 'Idol' Everything (AOL)

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Gay Guy Calls Leno on Homophobic Jokes

By this time Friday, every homo with an internet connection will know about Jeff Whitty's eloquently articulated outrage at Jay Leno's gay jokes. By Saturday night even Amish queers will be harnessing up the buggy to thank Whitty personally.



Jeff Whitty is the creator and writer of Avenue Q, a wildly successful Broadway musical starring puppets and live actors in a sort of mashup of 'Sesame Street' and 'Rent'. He got pret-ty sick and tired of Leno's consistent mockery of gay people on his show, and wrote an angry, well-written open letter to Leno that's burning down the internet.

The blogosphere is picking this thing up and taking it places, too. Rather than attempt to encapsulate the whole internet's reaction to this thing, I'll let you see it for yourselves.

It's easy to agree with Whitty here -- it is time that people stopped making a mockery of gays and gave us some respect. But on the other hand, isn't that a comedian's job, to mock people? We don't we lynch Howard Stern and Lisa Lampanelli (I happen to love her) for their comedy ... just because Leno is on mainstream television, should he be a target?

I do agree with Jeff Whitty on one issue though: Leno's gay jokes aren't funny at all. Leno's gay jokes aren't funny because Leno hasn't been funny for fifteen years.

 

Chevy Tahoe: Gayest SUV Ever

Anybody know the story on this commercial for the Chevy Tahoe? It appears to be from one of the tasks on this season's 'The Apprentice.'  I'm not watching the show, so I need you to tell me the scoop.

Click on Photo to Watch

I know this was never aired as a commercial (right?) but I'm curious to know if it was shown on the air as part of the TV show.

From top to bottom, this thing is suggestive. It's so homoerotically offensive, it's heartwarming.

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Billie Jean King Scores Big Points

'Billie Jean King: Portrait of a Pioneer' premiers on HBO, Thursday, April 26. This promises to be good. King told the New York Times yesterday, "I'm pretty open, I'm not hiding anything. So I pretty much spilled my guts." ('A Complex Life Gets a Closer Look' / AOL Sports/New York Times)



Outsports reviews the film and points out these remarkable facts about King:

"The first female athlete to earn $100,000 in a year (which got her a congratulatory phone call from President Nixon). Winner of a record 20 Wimbledon titles. An ardent feminist who had an abortion in 1973 (and whose husband told Ms. Magazine about it, much to her chagrin). Best buds with Elton John (who wrote "Philadelphia Freedom" in her honor). Founder of the Women's Tennis Assn., which pushed for bigger paydays for women players. Married for years before being outed in 1981 in a palimony suit. Named by Life magazine as one of the 100 most important Americans of the 20th century. Whew."

King accomplished a great deal, although we still have a ways to go. Blogger Shakespeare's Sister cites an interesting commentary (via Feministing.com) about an astonishing gender discrepancy in the prize money at Wimbledon that exists even today: $1.17 million for the men's champion and $1.1 million for the women's.

That's just so wrong, which is exactly why a brave woman like Billie Jean King was so right, and still is.

Tune in. See Trailer, Schedule (HBO)

 

Gays De-Gaying the Gayborhood

Don't look now, but upstanding, proper gay people are threatening to de-gay the gayest neighborhood ever.



An interesting story online today talks about the Castro, the fabled and beloved San Francisco neighborhood that has served as the gay mecca, our Oz, since the 1960s.

The phenomenon of de-gaying gay neighborhoods is nothing new. Traditionally, this happens when straight people (no offense) start moving into a previously decrepit neighborhood that gays have transformed into something livable and vibrant and beautiful. When that shift takes hold and gay neighborhoods lose their je-ne-sais-qoi, gay residents start to sense that they're becoming a minority in their own front yards. This bothers us. More established gay folk may cash out, the younger crowd can't afford the new home values, and basically the gay community sets its sights on the next frontier -- cheaper, fixer-up neighborhoods -- and moves on.



Only this time, it's not straight couples with kids who are threatening the personality of the Castro. It's us. Our own people -- with kids. They want the Castro cleaned up! And because it's the Castro, the gays who call it home don't necessarily want to tone down or move on from the very place where they can most be who they are.

The truth is that the Castro has been through many changes over the past 35-40 years. After its gay heyday in the 70s, the 1980s ushered in an eerie netherworld feeling as gay men were dying of AIDS. Young men in their prime walked the streets with canes, their faces marked with cancer. It wasn't a happy place (although it was filled with love.)  As gays were dying or needed the money, and real estate shot through the roof, straight people did start moving in. Today, you have to have bucks to live in the Castro. The median home price is over $700,000 in San Francisco. But it has remained to this day, somewhere-over-the-rainbow for gay people.

The Sydney Morning Herald story cites that there are 60,000 children being raised by same-sex parents in California (sorta mind-blowing) and the needs of those gay dads and lesbian moms are creating "tension between parents who want the more explicit window displays and posters [in the Castro] toned down and those determined to guard free sexual expression from any censorship."

Did you get that? Gay parents are basically telling the gays of Castro they are too gay.

William Rogers, a city official, said: "Traditionally, the Castro has been about adults, bars, sexual expression and a gay community that has largely focused on adult needs and desires.

"As more LGBTQ [lesbian, gay, transgender, bisexual, queer] people have children, there is an inherent tension between preserving that adult community and shifting towards a culture that includes children - and in some ways that means altering the meaning of the Castro to include the needs of children."

I'm all for the gayby boom. I think it's great. And I even look forward to the day when this whole conversation is moot -- when there's no need for "gay neighborhoods" because the world is such a tolerant and loving place and we can all live on one big happy planet. (OK, that's kind of a lie; I love gay neighborhoods!)  But, I am troubled by this movement to de-gay our gayest environs -- especially at the hands of my own people.

I say the Castro stays. Don't want your kids being exposed to "a Buddhist god with a very large penis" in the storefront on Castro Street? Move.


· Story: 'Sex Is Out as Families Move In to Floridly Gay District' (Sydney Morning Herald)
· Photo Tour: 'The Castro, a Symbol and Beacon of Acceptance'

 

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I Care So I Share. Enjoy.

These four videos will make you:

1) Breathe Heavy
2) Pee Your Pants
3) Have a Good Cry
4) Wonder How People Have This Much Time on Their Hands

'Sex Over the Phone' (You Tube via Screenhead.com)



Barbie Girl Lip Sinc (AOL Viral Videos)



Most Moving 'Brokeback Mountain' Mash Ever (You Tube, via Towleroad.com)



Titanic II: Jack is Back (AOL Viral Videos)



Today's Favorite Links: Get 'Em While They're Hot
Most Outrageous: CNN: God Save Our Flamboyant Queens (Gawker)
Most Useful: Self-Weighing Luggage (Boing Boing/Red Ferret)
Fashion: Gay Leis Lack Punch (Washington Post, Free Registration Required)
Lesbian Bonanza: Win an Autographed Poster of 'The Notorious Bettie Page' (Curve)
Jocks: Why Golf is So Gay (Outsports)

 

This Week's Gayest 'American Idol' Moments

This may have been the gayest 'American Idol' of the season so far. That's a pretty huge thing to be able to state, since as far as I can tell, there were absolutely zero cheap-ass jokes about Ryan Seacrest's supposed gayness.

What made it gay? If your gaydar was at all tuned in, these six things should have set it off:



1) The Theme: I'm not too ashamed to admit that I love a good piano bar. If I'd been sitting in the Kodak Theater Tuesday night with a Cosmo, I'd have sworn I was in any-gay-cabaret-USA. Not only that, but nearly every contestant did justice to the songs they chose. I simply loved it.

2) Chris' Outfit: Dream as I might, I know that big hunk of burning love isn't gay, but his outfit definitely was. An ascot? It was rather subtle, but it was still an ascot. Now if it had been all poofed up ... fugidaboutit.

3) Kelli's Shoes: She knew she sucked, but she also knew, like all smartly coiffed gay men do, that if your shoes are great you can get away with quite a lot. "When all else fails, you gotta have good shoes," she said. She's not as ditzy as she pretends. 

4) Paris' Ability to Lip-Sync: OK, I'm not saying she really lip-syncs, but I swear it's unnerving to hear her squeaky speaking voice transform into a truly amazing and gifted singing voice, then back to squeaky-ville again. It's so drag queen. It's like a guy who is a booming baritone slipping into a sequined cocktail dress and belting out Celine. Paris is practically a female impersonator. I mean that in a loving way, of course.

5) Katharine's Bling: Not only is she gorgeous, has the best voice and will probably win, she had the best jewelry. Where did she get those big, chunky, modern baubles -- and could I borrow them?

6) And Finally, Ace's Bun: Let's face it, it was time for him to go.Yeah, he's cute, but knows it, loves it and works it into the ground. The hottest guys are the ones who don't know it.

Basically, that bun killed him. I kept looking for a hair net.

I won't miss him, nor am I worried about his future. With his hair pulled back, he can always get a job as a body double for Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg.






More 'Idol'
· Mandisa: Out PFOX-ed (Joe.My.God.)
· Ace Finally Folds, But Is Daughtry in Danger? (The B.O.B.)
· 'Idol': The Final Three Become Clear (The Malcontent)

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Comments for Queerty

The men of Queerty paid me the highest compliment in the blogosphere today: they slammed 'Worth Repeating.' This touches me. It means they care.

Yesterday I wrote that they were wrong to accuse gay parents of using their kids as a prop in the fight for gay rights. Today they rebuked my incriminating blog post and said they were quoted out of context.

I don't buy it.  Neither does The Republic of T, who said as much today in his update to this little brouhaha. Queerty began and ended with derisive remarks about the poor kids getting dragged in front of the media without giving consent, then today say they're all for it.

Based on comments left on my blog, I at least know people agree with my take on the gay family Easter issue. If you want to let Queerty know how you feel, leave your comments here since they don't allow them on their site. Wonder why?

The comment drought also bugs Vivid Blurry, who reams Queerty thoroughly today and asks, "Isn't there a way to, like, shut down a blog for being totally pointless?"

I actually like Queerty. They amuse me pretty regularly, inform me sometimes, and occasionally have moments of brilliance, like the Big Gay Road Trip across America. I was going to see if I could get myself invited for a leg of that trip, and I think there's still a chance they'd take me on the ride if only so they could ditch me at a redneck rest stop.


P.S.: Thanks to big gay blogger-extraordinaire Joe.My.God. who added me to his blog roll today.

 

Do Gay Parents 'Use' Their Kids? No.

There's a gay debate in the blogosphere today about kids and their role in gay politics.



The puckish fellas at Queerty aren't crazy about gay dads and lesbian moms parading their kids to events like yesterday's White House Easter egg roll:

"Blah, blah blah ... Really, it's so sad to think about these little kids, having to deal with protestors and politicking and such, when they just want to play games and really don't get why all the adults have their undies in a bundle. Having fun shouldn't be this complicated when you're still in elementary school."

"... It's not fair to shove kids in front of news cameras when they don't know what they're getting themselves into -- and cannot choose for themselves whether or not to not be in the public eye. They didn't show up at the White house to prove a point. They're just there, being kids, rolling eggs down the grass with a spoon. They don't speak for you, they can barely speak for themselves."

MEANWHILE ... A gay dad who writes the blog The Republic of T and who took his young son to the White House ("We went, we saw, we rolled some eggs") has a different take on it:

"Still taking in the egg roll aftermath. It shouldn’t surprise me, but apparently even some gay people don’t get it. I’ve posted before on all the reasons for going, and I won’t repeat myself here. The only thing I can think of to say to gay folks who spout something close to the right wing rhetoric on this is an updated parental aphorism: Wait ’til you have kids, and realize that the rights and protections you don’t have they don’t have either."

In the earlier post he references, The Republic of T says:

"The reality is that anything we do as gay families with any degree of visibility is politicized. So if they weren’t objecting to our presence or participation, then all that’s left to object to is our visibility. And, as I discovered in the line to enter the gates, just by being visible as families we can make a difference in how people think about our families."

The Republic of T is right. Gay and lesbian families are, in and of themselves, political. The level of political activity varies with each family, but in this George Bush era of using gay rights, gay marriage and gay adoption as wedge issues to create an "us vs. them" mentality, it's political when Adam and Steve show up at the White House with little Suzie in the stroller, even though they have just as much right to be there as their straight next door neighbors. Suzie is as much a part of the political statement as Adam and Steve's being openly gay. In fact, she is the statement.

As for the Queerty boys, I would just say that no, the kids didn't choose to participate in making a big gay showing at the White House, but what kid gets to choose what his parents decide to do as a family? African Americans were being political when they decided it was time to take their place at the front of the bus. When they moved up front, their kids came with them. Did their kids choose that? No. But they're no longer in the back of the bus.

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Did the Bush's Bunny Diss Gay Families Today?

It rained in Washington this morning, giving an extra bit of hope to gay and lesbian families that a rainbow might cast an inclusive ray of light over the White House lawn where the president, Mrs. Bush and the Easter Bunny greeted thousands of youngsters gathered for the annual Easter egg roll.

Alas, it was not to be all that.



Hundreds of gay families organized to attend this year's event to make the point that yes, Mr. President, gay families are part of this country, too. Many waited in line overnight to ensure they would get tickets to the iconic American family tradition held on the president's lawn since 1878, but a last-minute logistics change made by the White House caused the early-bird gay families to miss out on the opening ceremonies.

  

Event hostess Mrs. Bush, who previously had announced that "all families are welcome to attend" in response to the the pre-event gay buzz, was long gone by the time the gay and lesbian families (read: second-class citizens) were allowed entrance at 11:00AM, two hours after the start of the event.

Our pals at PageOneQ have a good scoop on the turn of events, including some song-and-dance answers from the White House press office about the hare-raising time change.

Event organizer and executive director of the Family Pride Coalition Jennifer Chrisler (pictured below, far left, on the White House lawn with her family), didn't acknowledge the change in ticket times.

  

"We're just so happy to be participating in this national event, and we are thrilled to be a part of this national tradition," she told PageOneQ.

The "gay families are part of America" message got a lot of press attention -- mostly in the months leading up to today -- so perhaps Family Pride did accomplish their goal in raising the visibility of gay families. 

It's a little disingenuous for Chrisler to ignore the fact that the White House served gays some rotten eggs. But the real shame-on-you lies with the people to whose (White) house we gay folk were all invited today. We believed waiting in line was fair. We believed in equality for gay families.

So did we get punked by a bunny on Bush's behalf? You tell me.

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'Two and One-Half Feet of Irresistible, Tubular, Sex'

The jury seems to be out on 'Kinky Boots,' a Brit-flick opening today in which a drag queen (Chiwetel Ejiofor) saves the day for a shoe factory heir (Joel Edgerton) whose business is on its last leg.



Cinematical says, "If you loved 'Calendar Girls' and 'The Full Monty,' you'll love 'Kinky Boots.' (Read full review.)

I have to admit to being an easy target for the occasional sappy feel-good movie. (Checking showtimes now.)

Whoa. Blogger Nathanial over at the Film Experience Blog feels rather strongly: "I was going to review 'Kinky Boots' ... but, honestly, you wouldn't want to read it. Woulda been too bitchy ... Do-gooder drag queens are boring (not to mention unrealistic -- ever met one?)" (See his drag-filled blog post.)

Perhaps the critics at Hollywood Bitchslap (love them) put it best: "I can't think of any reason for you to see it, but I can't think of any reason not to, either." (Read full review.)

I'm going.

If you saw it, let me know what you thought.

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Andrew Sullivan: Gay'zd and Confused

It seems Andrew Sullivan's a little confused again. The big gay pundit/blogger/opinionator has "inned" Aaron Hicklin, the new editor of OUT magazine.



What on earth is "inned," you ask? It's only the newest part of gay lingo. "Inning" is what happens when people publicly identify gays as straight, as Sullivan did by mistake in publicly praising the publishers of OUT, saying "seriously, I think it's great that a straight guy is now heading up a gay magazine."

He apologized just as publicly and now everything is fine. Given that Sullivan is a proudly gay Republican, we can forgive a little confusion on his part.

But this is great, isn't it? It used to be people were afraid to be outed; now gays are upset to be inned. That's progress.

 

Needlepoint Gone Wild

If you heart arts and crafts and have a crewel streak, check out Julie Jackson's sharp-tongued site where she sells homey needlepoint sampler patterns with loving phrases like "Bite Me", "Pussy Got Me Dizzay" (pretty cat!) and, my favorite, "Homo Sweet Homo."

      
Photo: Jeff Nicholson for anezka handmade
Model: Lenore from the Suicide Girls


This is not your mother's needlepoint.

Jackson says she started creating the fun, needling works to help her cope with an annoying boss. She so amused herself with the bitchy bons mots, she decided to branch out and make her patterns available to anyone. She also has notecards and has just come out with a book featuring "35 designs for your surly side."

These samplers make great gifts. A framed handmade needlepoint that says "Thanks for Sharing" or "WTF?" is a beautiful way to say you care.

Got a good saying to suggest for one? Let's hear it.

· Subversive Cross Stitch

 

Prison Officer in Trouble for Showing 'Brokeback' -- Sex 'Too Explicit'

Categorize as: Get a Grip.

A prison officer in Massachusetts is being disciplined for showing 'Brokeback Mountain' to inmates.

A spokeswoman for the prison said, "I want to make it clear, it wasn't the subject matter -- it was the graphic nature of the sexually explicit scenes."



To which I say: Yeah, right. There is very little in the way of sexually explicit material in 'Brokeback Mountain.' (The prison's censor obviously hasn't seen the movie.)

· Officer Cited for Showing 'Brokeback' (AOL Gay & Lesbian)

In Other (Sorta Weird) Prison News...

· Scottish Prisons Recruiting Gay Guards (The Sunday Times, UK)
· Gay Man Who Murdered Boyfriend Skips Out (as in: Prison Break) (365Gay.com)

 

Note to Tom Shales, Washington Post: Gays Aren't Just About Gay Sex

Yesterday I wrote a review of 'All Aboard,' the Rosie O'Donnell movie about her cruise for gay and lesbian families. I liked the movie.

Tom Shales, the Washington Post critic did not.  That's fine -- we're all entitled to our own opinion.

When I read Shales' review, it made me kind of bristle. I felt like he didn't get the movie, but more importantly, that he was saying the movie was somehow misleading, that there's no such thing as a boatful of 1,500 gay men and lesbians who appear to be "wholesome" (whatever that is), vacationing with their kids.



He wrote: "It's as if the primary concern of Rosie O'Donnell, who captained the project, was presenting to the mainstream TV audience a scrubbed-up, politely tidy image of gay men and women -- a portrait meticulously devoid of the drag queens, pierced nipples and campy vamping one often sees when a local TV station rushes off to cover a gay-themed event."

So, what, gay people can't be depicted on TV as "scrubbed up" and "politely tidy"? Last I checked, there were plenty of gay men and lesbians who fall into that category. Not that I don't love me some drag queens and pierced-nipple vamps, mind you.

But the worst offense was this: "O'Donnell almost robs her subjects of their sexual identity in the pursuit of making them wholesome. In short, there is no gay cruising on this gay cruise."

As I said, when I read that it made me mad, but I just brushed it off. Until last night that is, when I was at my favorite DC hangout, the Duplex Diner, affectionately known as "Cheers for queers." As I made the rounds saying hi to friends, I mentioned my movie review in answer to the "how was your day" question. No less than three separate people I talked to went right to Tom Shales during our conversation -- including my friend Alex who had with him his son Ben, who's "five and three-quarters." People are P.O.'d at Tom Shales. It wasn't just me. 

We all were of the same mind which was: what the hell, Tom??? The boat was full of lesbian moms and gay dads and their kids; the whole purpose of the trip was a gay family vacation. These people were looking after their kids -- not looking for hook-ups.

Note to Tom: Not all gays are obsessed with cruising, even while on a gay cruise.

Read Tom's Review: 'Rosie's Family Cruise' Steers Away From Deep Water (Washington Post, Registration Required)

 

The Gay Agenda: Get Mandisa Booted Off 'American Idol' (Check!)

When the news came out last week about 'American Idol' starlet Mandisa's connection to a proponent of the ex-gay movement, I knew that girlfriend's days were numbered. So did blogger tv-holic, who wrote 'Mandisa: No Longer My Idol.'

We ran a poll on AOL Gay and Lesbian asking if this would cost her gay votes. Here is what voters said:.






Although Mandisa was a clear front-runner and possibly had the best voice of the entire cast this season, she ended up in the bottom three on the April 5 elimination show and ... she got booted off.

Now, TMZ reports that "Mandisa's anti-gay affiliation may have done her in."

Duh.

You can't win 'American Idol' if you cross the gays. It's that simple.

***************

Hot Update
Mandisa Talks to the Advocate:
Says No, She Wouldn't Be Comfortable Performing at a Gay Event

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Rosie and Kelli O'Donnell Get Gay Families 'All Aboard'

Rosie and Kelli O'Donnell created something very special two years ago when they founded R Family Vacations and organized a seven-day cruise for 1,500 lesbian moms and gay dads with kids -- plus their friends and extended families.



'All Aboard: Rosie's Family Cruise,' premiers tonight, an HBO film which documents the maiden voyage. I saw the movie, and getting throught it requires at least half a box of kleenex, if not a full one. There's something about seeing kids sticking up for their gay families that can really get to you, not to mention hearing the stories of gay men and lesbians who want little more in the world than just to be able to love their kids and be a family -- something that society doesn't always make it easy to do.



I spoke with Kelli O'Donnell this week who gave me the 411 on who showed up, what surprised her, and what she hopes America will get out of seeing the movie. Kelli, who refers to herself as the Julie McCoy of the ship, couldn't have been any nicer. Find out what she had to say here...

· Some Smooth Sailing for Gay Families

 

Bizarre Barroom Brawl

My hunky straight pal Jeff is running a true story today that will blow your minds, for several reasons:

1) It features a fist fight in a gay bar, and you know that never happens. (Does it?)
2) One of the guys involved is a Santero, or priest in the Afro-Cuban religion known as Santeria.
3) The fist fight is the result of an actual love spell gone horribly awry.
4) The main character is so simultaneously hot and adorable that you'll join his sect immediately.



Don't take my word for it ... See it for yourself.

I'd like to tip my cowboy hat to the fellas at Queerty as well, who also linked to this story today. Jeff may sit two cubicles down from me, but they still beat me to it.

 

Are All Television Programming Execs GAY???

If I didn't have TIVO, I might never leave home. TV is so gay right now, I'm surprised rainbows don't flow out of my television when I turn it on. 



I think that by now it's pretty clear: Making TV gay is part of the gay agenda. The gay ghosts of Paul Lynde, Liberace and Barbara Stanwyck are sitting in on network programming meetings and just making TV gay for the fun of it. Hey, I'm all for it.

Here are a few homo-highlights on my recommended list:


'Liza With a Z' was given a second life on Showtime on Saturday night -- and thank God. This gem was originally broadcast on TV in 1972 and it zings! with energy and entertainment. This is Liza at her best -- before everyone started thinking she was crazy. They just don't make shows like this for TV anymore.

Director and choreographer Bob Fosse delivered on pizzazz, while celeb-fashion designer Halston did all the costumes which were fab. Check out the amusing account by our blogger pals at Gawker about the big premier that Showtime hosted in NYC a couple of weeks ago: It’s a Gay Gay Gay Gay World: ‘Liza With a Z’ at the Ziegfeld. 

Watch 'Liza With a Z.' Check here to see when it will be on again, or you can buy it on DVD.




Fast forward to 2006 via the '90s, and set your watches to tickle time for a hilarious romp with none other than Tori Spelling in her new VH1 show, 'NoTORIous.' Spelling has taken ownership of every barb, every joke, every spoiled-brat damnation spewed her way since the glory days of Daddy's 'Beverly Hills 90210' and turned them upside down in a scripted, reality-TV-like show about a celebrity whose life very much resembles that of, well, Tori Spelling. Now we're laughing with her. Go girl!

Gays love Tori (she cemented that with her role in 'Trick') and Tori loves her some gays. As she tells The Advocate in a recent interview: "If there were no gay men in my life … Oh, my God, I wouldn't exist." Duh!

There's more. So much more. Between Rosie O'Donnell's HBO movie this week, 'All Aboard,' Bravo's 'Blow Out' (OK, everything on Bravo), 'Real World Key West,' the winding down of 'Will and Grace,' reruns of 'Buffy the Vampire Slayer' and 'Xena: Warrior Princess,' and Biography's 'Hairdos and Heartache: The Women of Country Music' (no, I'm not kidding), plus a good dozen other shows with gay characters, you can't change the channel on your TV without someone hitting you with their purse. I mean that in a loving way, of course.

And what are you watching?