This may have been the gayest 'American Idol' of the season so far. That's a pretty huge thing to be able to state, since as far as I can tell, there were absolutely zero cheap-ass jokes about Ryan Seacrest's supposed gayness.
What made it gay? If your gaydar was at all tuned in, these six things should have set it off:
1) The Theme: I'm not too ashamed to admit that I love a good piano bar. If I'd been sitting in the Kodak Theater Tuesday night with a Cosmo, I'd have sworn I was in any-gay-cabaret-USA. Not only that, but nearly every contestant did justice to the songs they chose. I simply loved it.
2) Chris' Outfit: Dream as I might, I know that big hunk of burning love isn't gay, but his outfit definitely was. An ascot? It was rather subtle, but it was still an ascot. Now if it had been all poofed up ... fugidaboutit.
3) Kelli's Shoes: She knew she sucked, but she also knew, like all smartly coiffed gay men do, that if your shoes are great you can get away with quite a lot. "When all else fails, you gotta have good shoes," she said. She's not as ditzy as she pretends.
4) Paris' Ability to Lip-Sync: OK, I'm not saying she really lip-syncs, but I swear it's unnerving to hear her squeaky speaking voice transform into a truly amazing and gifted singing voice, then back to squeaky-ville again. It's so drag queen. It's like a guy who is a booming baritone slipping into a sequined cocktail dress and belting out Celine. Paris is practically a female impersonator. I mean that in a loving way, of course.
5) Katharine's Bling: Not only is she gorgeous, has the best voice and will probably win, she had the best jewelry. Where did she get those big, chunky, modern baubles -- and could I borrow them? 
Basically, that bun killed him. I kept looking for a hair net.
I won't miss him, nor am I worried about his future. With his hair pulled back, he can always get a job as a body double for Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg.
More 'Idol'
· Mandisa: Out PFOX-ed (Joe.My.God.)
· Ace Finally Folds, But Is Daughtry in Danger? (The B.O.B.)
· 'Idol': The Final Three Become Clear (The Malcontent)
Comments | Worth Repeating: Home | AOL Gay & Lesbian
16 comments:
Kenny, Kenny, Kenny: I shouldn't have to explain Kelly's shoes to you of all people. Those were NOT great shoes. Those were a lucite heel away from stripper shoes.
Is it just me, or did Rod Stewart's face look GIGANTIC next to Seacrest?
Get a life! Not everything revolves around your sexual preferance.
HAHAHAHA!!! very funny and soooooooooooo true now that i think about it!!!
By the way Entertainment Weekly dubbed that Chris had the greatest odds of winning (2-1) and Katherine only has 5-1....sorry to say I don't think she'll win, and I don't want her to win!!!!
You are a moron. Do you get a rise out of dissing other people. It just makes you lower than you already are. Good going.
Kara wrote: "I shouldn't have to explain Kelly's shoes to you of all people. Those were NOT great shoes. Those were a lucite heel away from stripper shoes."
Kara dear: that's precisely why I loved them. 'Showgirls' meets 'Amercian Idol'. Right on!
Why such negativity?
Seriously, u people that are saying all this stuff...like they "GAYEST" american idol moments, u really need to like GROW UP...leave it be...GET A LIFE!!!!!!!!
this is reading a little too much into this subject me thinks.....good grief.
why?
please give me back 137 seconds of my life for reading this "pulled out of your ass" article.
omg whoeva u r...this is soo flippin funny!!! and soo true. i hope ur not some freaky old man/woman who is tryin to act all young and stuff...cuz if that is the case than im NEVER gonna read ur blog like ever again. srry . ok well lmao bye
ok who ever wrote this seriously needs a life, how the heck do you tell if someone is gay by thier jelwery and shoes??? not to mention all the stars who lipsync jessica simpson, brittany spears....so they're all female inpersonators? all reality tv is staged people please find something better to do with your lives.
waste of my time... this wasn't funny at all... and ryan seacrest's supposed gayness?? there were many jokes made about that but they were not very obvious.. this "article" was not worth writing at all.. it could've been funny but you failed, miserably.
Is this a joke?? I didn't think AOL would stoop so low and be full of such defamation. It is a disgrace that this was posted in the Gay and Lesbian section. Shame on you for spreading such hate.
I LOVE TAYLOR HICKS!!
AS FAR AS I AM CONCERNED, HE IS GOING TO BE THE AMERICAN IDOL FOR 2006!
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